Wednesday, May 28, 2008

I Know how you feel

I'm dead. Totally.
When I heard I have to present my ideas in front of the school, I nearly had a mental breakdown. I never enjoy the feeling of standing in front of everyone else, especially to talk about my ideas. Last night, I practiced the presentation but it went out bad. I totally forget what I'm suppose to say, and I mumble nearly all of the words. I'm dead.

After 7 hours of nightmare, I woke up to face my deepest fear. I ate my breakfast and asked my mom for advise. A fruitless attempt. She started talking about her childhood memories and, I'm not so sure, but she started talking about how she and dad met.

About 20 minutes later, we arrived. She gave me a kiss on the forehead and wished me luck. That was unusually encouraging. I nearly cried. But I must hold my together, I must be strong.

It's assembly time now. Every students in our school sat in a huge circle. The circle of death.

My palms and my forehead is sweaty. I have sweats rolling down my cheek into my shirt. I hold tight to my index cards as if they are my life line.

The seniors just finished telling their weekend story to the school. How did they do that?! They are so calm. How come they are so brave? John just finished telling how he helped an old lady to cross the road. He was the oldest student in our school, also the funniest. Everyone was laughing, except me. I can't let anything come into me, I can't. If I blow this one, I might turn into the biggest joke in our school.

Its principle's time now. He is talking about our new school rule, the dress code. But I didn't hear a thing. I was lost in my nervousness. What I do notice was, he totally brought the atmosphere down. His deep voice always indicates that he is serious.

Great, the happy atmosphere which the seniors built is gone. The circle looks like a disease infested swamp due to everyone's angry faces.

About 3 or 4 minutes later, my adviser started speaking. He introduced Jessica and me to the whole school. We are going to be the joker for today. He explained our presentation, and the hard times we are going through now. Yes, finally someone know how I feel. But after taking a quick glance at the crowd, I found out that no one really cares. A bunch of ignorance peoples! This will definitely lead to serious criticisms.

First up is Jessica, yes! Her english is worse then me, I hope she mess her speech up, so that I would look better than her. She told me she didn't even practice the speech, or make any index cards.

Her speech was poorly done. She didn't clearly get her ideas across, but the crowds loved it. She made the crowd laugh. The way she did her speech was terrible, but its was funny, and plus, shes more popular. After accepting the warm cheers and claps, Jessica left the stage. It's me, all by myself, fighting against the whole world with my 3 pages index cards.

A sudden silent came, everyone is staring at me. I totally lost my speech. But looking at my index cards, I realized I had the wrong index card. This is the one I had for my english class's presentation. Damn!

Suddenly, my adviser stood up. He asked everyone to give me a round of applause. So they did, but it made me more nervous. I just want to hind in the corner forever.

After another minute of silence, I decided to just give it a try. I started my presentation. I was mumbling in the beginning. I don't even understand myself, but about 5 minutes later, I started enjoying the presentation. I remember everything I have to say, and I made the audiences laugh a few time. After my presentation, I received lots of compliments. The teachers shacked my hand with a warm smile. The seniors were saying how brave I was. Jessica was mad, I'm more popular now, but I don't care how she feels. All i care is, I made it. I'm a winner.

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